GLORIOUS MORNING..

Ok.....so I would be LYING if I told you that this was a good week for me....it was torture actually.  I posted last that my friend Erin would be in China getting her daughter this week and next week and that there was a possibility, God willing, that she would be able to go to Mabry's orphanage.  Well their gotcha day was monday and without telling their story which is not mine to tell, lets just say that since their sweet girl was coming from foster care she had a very difficult gotcha day and apparently really was grieving.  I heard from Erin early in the week and she said that the foster parents AND the guides were STRONGLY urging her not to visit the orphanage as it would be too traumatic during a traumatic time.  So although I totally understood I continued to pray for God to work it out.  Well Thursday evening I got another message from Erin, who apparently is having TERRIBLE internet service and therefore had had NO contact the rest of the week, anyway, Thursday night she said that she was gonna still try to go and her husband was going to stay with their little girl and not go.....well friday came and went....no news, no idea if she went or not, no idea if the nannies allowed her to see our sweet Mabry or not.....just plain torture.  We have been staying busy trying to keep our mind off of it and we pretty much knew that no news basically meant that the trip to the orphanage didn't happen...so we began to prepare ourselves for the wait for the next update which will be awhile.  Well we of little faith....God totally had it under control!!!!  Can I tell you that I woke up this morning to a message from Erin saying that she was able to go to the orphanage and out of the 3 kiddos she was going to check on, Mabry was the ONLY one that she was allowed to see!!!!  She warned me that all the kiddos were sound asleep when she arrived and that they lifted Mabry out of her crib for her to take pictures so although Mabry was NOT happy in the pics she appeared to be very healthy!  That is all this momma could ask for!!!!!!  She then went on to send me the sweetest pictures of our sweet little girl.. I woke Jason up this morning to the site of our sweet babies face....and he and I watched as the pictures of Mabry kept popping up on the screen as Erin was sending them from China....isn't technology AMAZING!!!!!!

Anyway, I have been really trying to think of how to thank this human being for bringing me this blessing and am still trying to find the perfect gift for her...if you have an idea I would love to hear it....it has to be perfect!!!!  I have a few ideas but would be interested to hear if anyone thinks along the same lines as me!!!!  I will share a few of the pictures below.....the one is of her crib so we got to actually see her sleeping arrangement which is such a blessing....now when we dream at night we will have the setting right!!!  I just want to say that the blessings that God keeps giving us is VERY humbling because we are FULLY aware of how undeserving we are of these amazing blessing!!!!!  Praying for BIG news from China this week as we are praying that the LOA that we have been waiting for for about 60 days will come this week....please pray with us because once we get this LOA we will be able to have a good idea of when we will be traveling...we are pretty sure it will be June but would love to have an idea of exactly when we will see her face.  Thanks for all the prayers being sent for our family!!!  Praising God together today!!!!!

that sweet face

Ok....so imagine giving birth to your sweet baby and seeing that face for the first time....you tried and tried to get pregnant and then waited thru the 9 month (if you're lucky) pregnancy and then the day comes.....you have the rush of excitement and see their sweet face for the first time....it is the MOST amazing thing ever....then imagine that the nurse comes in and leaves you a picture, frozen in time, of that sweet face and tells you that in 4-5 months you can come back and pick up that baby.  So this is EXACTLY what we are going thru but it is a good idea of what this is like.  Jan 16, 2014 we opened an email that would change our lives forever.....in the click of my phone we saw her sweet face.....that face from one day last summer and now that face is frozen in time until we get to go get her and bring her home.  Now we were blessed with the update, which is amazing and gives us another day frozen in time....but it's amazing how much she changes every time I see her!!!  Well all of that to say that tonight (monday in china) in about 4 hours the lady I met on Facebook will find out if she will get to visit her daughters orphanage as today is GOTCHA day for her...she is picking her daughter up in 4 hours.  If you is granted the orphanage visit, Friday she will go to the orphanage where my sweet Mabry is living.  She has a care package that Jason and I put together for her to give to mabry which was all stuffed into a gallon ziplock (when there's a will, there's a way) and it included a blankie, an outfit, a hair bow (duh), a flash drive (which I hope to get back on my gotcha day full of pics), a princess Belle plush doll, and a book that I made that has individual pictures of Jason, Me, Connor, Grady, our house, and a family picture along with our titles (dad, mom, brother, family, home) written in English and also in Chinese Characters with the hope that her nannies can read to her and show her our pictures.  We know from other people's experiences with Mabry's orphanage that she will no be allowed to keep this stuff but rather they will go thru it with her and then they will pack it up and put it away until we pick her up.  They really try to keep it fair for the kids that don't have families waiting for them which I totally get...I wish she could keep the book but I get it.  But still how amazing that she might see our faces for the first time THIS FRIDAY!!!!!  The other amazing thing about this visit is that that face that is frozen in time will be replaced with a new picture of PICTURES of her sweet face a month older than the last time we saw her....think about that...not seeing your childs face for an entire month...they change so much, trust me!!!!!  So please be praying with me for Erin and her family as they are getting their daughter...and also for Wren , her daughter, as gotcha day is an amazing moment in time but the scariest thing these little kiddos have to go thru!!!!!  And also pray that she gets to see Mabry, kiss her, hug her, shower her with our gifts, and also take lots of pictures!!!!!  This momma really needs to see her face and also to know that she is well and that she is being taken care of.  Also just warms my heart to know that at least I know she will have receive one hug/kiss before I get there.....although I believe her orphanage is meeting her needs, I also know the reality of what an orphanage is and what is asked of those nannies!

If we get updates this week via the orphanage visit there will be another blog at the end of the week!!!!

my dearest Jason

So...I have been obsessing over my email...refreshing it about every 3.376 seconds waiting to get SOMETHING from my social worker....anything would be appreciated at this time.  It seems that we have taken the slow route to LOA which isn't an easy place to be......no one can understand why some go quick and some don't but I assume God's timing is perfect so I am sure it's gonna become obvious some day why we waited.  With all of this obsession I have been on edge...today I decided to quit obsessing....to just be thankful for what I have and boy should I be thankful!!!!!  I want to do this blog about Jason because this adoption process has come with such growth for all of us but I am so thankful that God gave Jason to me!!!

I have written about how Jason wasn't on board with the adoption until we lost Chesney and how in the delivery room he brought adoption up and said that we would talk about it as soon as I was ready. God totally used our experience with the loss of our daughter to change Jason's heart.  Well I will tell you that Jason and I had a great marriage before we started this process but I can tell you that I love him even more now then I did then....I love that we are growing together and that I am really seeing him stretch because he loves me.  Anyone that knows Jason knows that he HATES to fly.  Disney trips have been a huge challenge that he has taken for our kids but he HATES to fly...like scared to death.  When we started this process it was just assumed that Jason wouldn't travel.  I mean the facts are that when he took 3 days off of work while I delivered Chesney people got mad.....and also how could he make a 14 hour flight when he HATES to fly.  So we were very thankful that his mom agreed to go with me so that I wouldn't' have to travel alone.

Well after we saw Mabry's face, and the fact that we were REALLY going to travel to get our daughter set in, I started to panic about him not going.  It's not that I can't do it without him...but I don't want to.  I went to him with my concerns and with how I was feeling.  Literally 3 days later the decision was made that he would go for the first week but that he couldn't stay for both weeks because he couldn't possibly take off 2 weeks of work.  I mean folks that is GROWTH.....honestly I still am in shock that he has agreed to take that flight and to deal with the jet lag that is so horrible because of his growth...seriously one of just a few great men that have touched my life and I am proud to call him my husband.  I am still working on him to stay the entire time because I don't want him to fly back alone.  He is considering it but is afraid to take that much time off of work all at once.  We are blessed to have Dr Keller to cover the office for us while we are gone....Jason just doesn't like to put anyone out and he truly cares for and worries about his patients.  He has agreed to consider going the entire time if we can condense the trip to 10 days and since our trip is only 1 province and not 2 that is a real possibility.  I thank God every single night in my prayers for giving me a husband that is willing to stretch himself for me....that is growing with me......and is genuinely the best guy I know!!!

FIRED UP...

OK...I will apologize before I get going but I am FIRED up today!!!!  I read an article about a baby hut that is being put up in the city that Mabry is from where people can SAFELY leave a baby...there is a buzzer they hit and it is on a delay which gives the moms time to get away before someone hears it to come and get the baby...but the hut is warm and safe!!!  I think people read these things and think, that is just terrible that people just leave these babies....let me spin it this way....the babies that are left are LUCKY!!!!  The alternative to these desperate situations is abortion and without these brave mommas going thru the pregnancy knowing that they are going to leave these babies and risk getting caught and in trouble makes these women AMAZING!!!!  So I love this idea to give these sweet mommas a safe alternative for their sweet babies.  I love Mabry's biological mom for making the choice to let her live and have a chance at life!!!

OK, next....I got an email from my agency with some of the things that they are doing with their partnerships.  Here is the thing...my agency is SMALL...very small...but that doesn't stop them from being amazing and doing HUGE things in China!!!  You see some BIG agencies in the US don't have any partnerships.  Now that makes for families waiting MUCH longer for a referral....so yes having the partnerships help the agencies match families quick which is really nice...but the best thing about the partnerships is that you don't just get them because you say you want them...you get the partnership in exchange for financially supporting these specific orphanages all year.  Now MAA has 10 partnerships right now and are constantly getting more....they are a small agency and are actually looking for families with Log In Dates because they have so many kiddos coming in.  But here is the thing that has me fired up!!  MAA is partnered with Mabry's orphanage and in the update today they said that they have hired an english teacher for the 2014 year to teach the kiddos some english and really start telling them about forever families and adoption!!!  This means that finally these children will learn of the hope....kind of like when you were told about Salvation!!!  These sweet kiddos will be a little less afraid if they are made aware of what is going to happen and who these strange looking people are that are loving on them.  Now i don't know if this is going to be in place enough for it to really matter to Mabry...I sure hope so....but either way I LOVE THIS!!!  We didn't do any fundraising for the adoption because we have been very blessed.....but I want to do what I can for this orphanage...so this is what I came up with.  The orphanage will tell us an amount of cash that we have to bring to give them as a donation....but I want to blow that out of the water...and ANYTHING that we raise above that amount....which will take God's help because it will have to be a lot....will go directly to MAA (my agency) in Mabry's name and I will ask them to use it specifically for things like this at the orphanage that Mabry is from!!!!  I want to use this adoption to bless as many other children as I can!!

So along with the tshirts...which by the way are still for sale!!!  we are going to do two more HUGE fundraisers.  We are going to have a garage sale in March or april where all the money made will go to the orphanage....so start that spring cleaning early and any donations are welcome!!  Anything not sold at the sale will be donated to Lighthouses Hands of Mercy.....another great cause.  But today I am announcing our final garage sale and this is for every single person reading this blog.....you don't have to live close to me to participate and you can tell all of your friends!!!  I am asking for you to pick a number 1-100.....pick quick because there is only 1 of each of these numbers available....and whatever number you pick I want you to donate that amount of money to the cause...so if you pick $1 then you will take an envelope and send it to me with a huge 1 on the back and $1 inside....I challenge you to get your kiddos involved!!!!  Kids are not too young to know about less fortunate kids then them around the world.....My goal is to get rid of every number 1-100......now you can Facebook me and see what numbers are available...you can text me 6183140499....whatever you need to do....Please don't just assume someone else will do it...this is a small way that everyone can help!!!!!!!!!  YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE!!!!!!!!

Please pray about whether God is calling your to help in this way.....everyone is called in scripture to help orphans......I know I say it all the time but not everyone is called to adopt but we are all called to help....let me know how you can help and which number works best for you...and if you want more than 1 number I am good with that too......

Thanks for reading this rant today!!!!!!  Let's go and make a difference!!!!

Small glimpse of our sweet Mabry

Here is a small glimpse of Mabry...she is in the blue....she must have been told to hold on to the little girls shirt and boy does she follow directions.

prayer request

OK....so we are currently 11 days into our LOA (letter of approval) wait and I am getting really excited.  I am excited because once we get LOA we will be able to guess when we will be traveling.  LOA waits are anywhere from 50-100+ days....so there is no way to guess how long you will wait until you have LOA...once you have that the rest is pretty structured.  I am praying so hard that God gives us a quick LOA because I did the math and with 100 day LOA we will miss Mabry's birthday by a coupe weeks.....if we happen to be blessed with a quick LOA we could potentially be in China with her for her birthday or possibly even have her home...either of those are perfect for me!!!!  Since I believe in the power of prayer I am asking/begging that you all join with me to pray for a FAST LOA....so fast that people will not be able to deny that God was there!!!!  Also we requested an update on Mabry...we were told that we could request 2 and our case worker suggested we request one when we submitted our LOI (letter of Intent to adopt Mabry) and then the other at LOA.....and then we will be so close to travel that we won't need another one......so I am waiting for that update and praying that it includes new pictures and new measurements so that I can begin buying...who am I kidding, I am already buying....but I can be sure I am buying the right sizes.....

Also with this update we were allowed to ask several questions, so I am hoping that we get answers to some of those too....like how they soothe her when she is upset, how she soothes herself, how she plays with other kids, does she use a bottle or sippy cup, is she potty training, does she sleep in a crib or toddler bed style bed, just things like that......then I can also better prepare for her to come home!!!!!!  Alright really this update was just about the specific prayer request!!!!!!  Love you all and am very thankful that you are all along on this journey!!!  Once Mabry is home for a bit we will have an open house so that you can all come by and meet her......Thanks for your continued prayer....God has been here every step and it is so wonderful how much His presence is felt daily!!!!

BIGGEST NEWS YET

Ok so we got logged in date (LID) on 1/2 and were so excited when our caseworker informed us that they were expecting partnership files soon.  Now there are 2 ways to get referrals Partnership or shared list.  Shared list comes out 1 time a month and every agency is on it so it is very competitive and quickly moving!!!  Partnerships are where our agency supports that orphanage financially and therefore gets ALL of their referrals.  Now the agency we started with didn't have partnerships but this new agency has 10!!!!  So...the other benefit to partnerships is that usually someone at your agency has met those children in person and therefore have a better picture of their development and health.

Well we waited and waited and on 1/16 at 3:30 I received an email from my caseworker with the subject "Hattie".  I immediately opened the email and there was a little note from my caseworker saying that they had just received this little girls file that day and they thought she was a great match for our family!!!  She went on to say that she was 2.5 and listed as a mild congenital Heart defect.  The email went on to have videos from when the lady from our agency was there and then her medical records.  SO of course we were freaking out!!!!  We scanned over the medical and it honestly looked good.....we googled the defect and honestly weren't too worried about it.  I have a friend that I have met thru the adoption stuff who is also adopting and I immediately texted to tell her.  Then God showed up....she said that her brother in law was a cardiologist and she could email him the file and he would look at it.  So of course we did....and that same day we got an email back saying that the file looks good.  We also sent the file to our pediatrician and he was going to get back to us the next day.

Well as you can imagine we were so excited that we were almost certain we were going to accept so we went and told our parents...they were very surprised and excited!!!  Well the next day we got the call from our pediatrician who wasn't worried at all by the file and so we submitted out LOI ( letter of intent) to adopt our sweet Mabry.  And usually your PA takes a week or 2...(PA is pre approval) well we received PA that same day!!!!  So once you have PA you are safe to share the pictures and the news....so here it is....we have our sweet Mabry's information!!!

She is a tiny little peanut!!!  She is only in 18 month clothing.  She will be 3 June 1.  Specific prayer request is that I am praying that we will be with her for her 3rd bday.  It doesn't seem all that likely but I believe God can totally work that out if it's his will!!!!

Prepare to be blown a way with cuteness.....

LID 1/2/14

OK....I have literally been stalking my email for the past 10 days!!!  Today I got the email that I have been waiting for...LID today!!!!!  Literally I got the email like 4.23 minutes ago, ran upstairs and showed Jason, posted in my adoption fb groups and then started this blog!!!!!!  I know that for those that aren't in the adoption world this really doesn't seem like a big deal...but here is why it is a BIG deal!!!!  We are officially now a WAITING FAMILY!!!  This means that any file that our agency gets we will be thought of as a potential family for that sweet baby girl!!!  So all this means is that China has received our dossier and have officially logged us into their system.  I suppose this means that we have a  number or some identifying power because when the shared list comes out once a month, the agency grabs the file of the child that they think is a match for you and then puts your name on it for the 72 hour hold...this gives you 72 hours to decide if you want to move forward or not!!!  So we are now eligible for the once a month list that comes out and is shared with ALL OTHER AGENCIES...very competitive.  However, we are also eligible for the orphanage partnerships that our agency gets sole files from....and from what I hear there are some of those coming.....and this is huge because I am with a small agency and they have several partnerships...this is NOT NEAR as competitive because only LID families with my agency are allowed to receive those files.....so here is the new year and waiting to see our daughters face in 2014!!!!  This is a big day at the Gladson's house today!!!  Lots of dancing going on!!!!  The next step is just waiting for her file to be given to us by God....and as of now that could be ANY DAY!!!!!

So excited that we are now labelled "a waiting family!!!!!!!  No more paper chase!!  Well no more paper chase until we are preparing to bring Mabry home....but right now we just sit back and let God do the work!!!  All we can do now is wait and lots of praying!!!  Please join us in praying for patience and discernment as we continue to seek where God is leading!!!

Dossier is in china!!!

Just a quick update!!!  I have tracked our dossier and it made it to Chine Friday morning at 11am China time!!!!!  Just one more thing we have done!!!  Hoping for an LID (log in date) next week sometime. Once you have LID you are eligible for a referral!!!!!!  Bring on 2014!!!!!

God shows up BIG

This "process" started in March 2013 when we filled out our application for adoption.  At that time I kept saying that my goal was to have my paperwork sent off by the end of the year.  It was pushing it but it gave me something to work towards.  We all know how the immigration wait went!!!  The 2 weeks expected wait reached 62 days before we got approval.  This definitely all but ruined our chances of getting our dossier out in time.  This is where God steps in......my fingers can't type fast enough to explain!!!

So, I received word thru email that we got immigration approval on Dec 12...as you may recall since we were waiting so long for the approval I went ahead and send the rest of my dossier documents off to get state sealed and authenticated in case something needed corrected.  Well all of those were fine so the courier kept them until she received my immigration approval so that I would just pay express shipping to me once.  So they were finished.  Well the actual immigration approval came to my house on december 14...a saturday.  Well that gave me all weekend to do every time line possible in my head!!!!  After talking to the courier on Sunday it became clear that I could expedite the process TREMENDOUSLY if I went to Chicago on monday and got the document state sealed and dropped it off at the consulate....since our courier works Monday, tuesday and thursday, all I had to do was drop off and pay to have it expedited, then she could pick up on thursday (today) and overnight it to me!!!  So....even though this is something that I would NEVER do I left my house at 2:30 am on monday morning and headed to the train station.  I caught the 4am train to Chicago.  Got to Chicago about 9:30, jumped in a cab and went to the index to get the state seal done...this was to be a quick process but had to be done in order to get the authenticating done.  So I had my form notarized in nashville the night before and when I got to the index they informed me that the notary had put her name in a blank that should have had my name.....this meant that they wouldn't accept it.  HOLY MOLY!!!  Now what!!!  I just travelled all the way to Chicago and can't get any of this done.....thankfully this is the first time God stepped in.  The night before when I was getting it notarized I had 3 forms with me to have her notarize just in case I would need an extra.....well the first one I filled out at her house I messed up so I just put it aside....well thankfully that form was in there.  So I had one that hadn't been notarized yet.  I showed the guy and the index and he said that I could walk 4 blocks and there was a notary and then I could come back and finish up...Thanks God!!!!  SO I hustled those 4 blocks realizing the time crush I was sure to be in due to the consulate closing for lunch and then for the day at 2:30.  SO I got it notarized and hustled back ( I have to be honest I hustled for time but also in fear of being part of the knock out game!)  and when I got back the guy said that the document was now fine and I could take a seat and he would finish it up!!!  SO about 10 min later my name was called and I was on my way!!  I walked across the street to Office Max and made the copies of the document and then caught a cab to the consulate.

The consulate was VERY intimidating!!!  All these people that didn't speak english rode up the elevator with me and were literally running from the elevator to the consulate room!!  I guess they knew that place MUCH better than me and how difficult it would be to get a place in line and be seen that day.  This is where God stepped in again....when I got to the door there was a lady standing by the door and she must have seen it in my eyes and said...Are you courtney....ummmm...yes....well she said that she was Denise Hope...my courier!!!  She had been there making her delivery for the day and even though she is a pro with it she knows how difficult it can be!!!!  So she waited there for me so that she could do the drop off for me!!!  The other good thing about her being there is that she grabs a consulate number and gets thru the line WAY faster...what would have taken me 2 hours took her 20 min!!!!  She then said welll hon what are your plans...I said well I will probably grab lunch and then wait until 4 to catch my train home.  It was not even noon yet as she saved the day for sure!!!  She then went on to offer to drive me to the mall on michigan ave (which I know rather well) and I accepted....so I got to eat there and walk around a bit before heading to the train station..

Confession....I was walking out of the water tower mall and I heard someone else yelling my name....I turned around and it was the american girl store....so yes I went in and made a purchase!!!  What can I say, I am only human!!!

So I then grabbed a taxi to the train station and caught my train without a hitch...also met some lovely ladies at the station!!!!  I know you are all thinking, wow that is a day full of God stepping in to show that He is in total control....but people, this isn't where this story ends!!!!!

So I called my agency and told her of my whirlwind day in Chicago and she said that IF I could have my paperwork to her by monday morning that she would do everything she could to get my paperwork off to China by monday at the end of the day because the agency is closed from 12/24-1/3!!!  So I knew that I would have to have my paperwork by friday in time to then overnight to Delaware!!!!  Well Wed night we had some friends over that are moving out of state and I get an email from my courier.  She said that she had decided out of the blue to drive into the consulte on wed (her day off) to pick up my document.  Ok people she drives over an hour 1 way!!!  This was totally God stepping again....she didn't ask for me to pay her more or anything, she just decided to show me Mercy!!!!  Thank you Jesus!!!!  She then went on to tell me that the USPS mailing that I paid for wasn't going to get it to me until friday so she was going to Fedex it to me so I would get it Thursday, thats right today!!!!  So I have waited all day even though it looked like we were going to get it until 6 tonight according to lady on the phone...it showed up at 3:30!!  Just enough time to make the copies that I needed, double check, and overnight to my agency today!!!!

While at the post office getitng ready to send my paperwork to my agency there was a guy that I go to church with there.  I told him what I was doing and he offered to take a picture for me...which you won't see because I haven't showered yet as I have been waiting all day for fedex man!!!!  Then before he left he said "I am only in the facility about 4 times a year, and now I know why I was in here today!"  I mean how sweet is that!!!!  God bless you Mitch!!!!

So I guess what this LONG message was trying to say is this...God showed up HUGE to prove to me that nothing is impossible for the God that saves!!!  God can move mountains MUCH bigger than what He moved for me but the point is that it is clear that He is sovereign over this entire process.  I just know that we will see the sweet face of Mabry soon...all in Gods timing!!!  So...I will update when we are dossier to china but for today it is dossier to Delaware...and hoping to be DTC tomorrow or Monday!!!!  Merry Christmas and a HAPPY New Year!!!!

GIANT step forward!!!

So there have been many trying points during this adoption paper chase!!!!  Oct 10, I overnighted my I800A to homeland security...this is a request for the US to approve us adopting from China known as immigration approval!  Well our receipt date was 10-11-12.  We were told that it usually takes a couple weeks for approval however the US government decided to shut down...ugh....well this slowed EVERYTHING down and things backed up!!!!!  So....62 days later we have APPROVAL!!!!  I had been calling and checking on it weekly for the past few weeks....I knew we were really close but received an email from my officer assigned to my case saying that we were approved on 12-12...yep my 33 birthday!!!  Best birthday ever!!!  I told a friend that it is amazing how much difference a year makes because just last year on my birthday was the day that Chesney's obituary came out and it was a really terrible day for me!!!!  SO what does this approval mean???  Well just yesterday, 12-14 we received the paper approval in the mail, so tonight I am going to make my copies and Christie Gajewski has graciously agreed to notarize it for me, and tomorrow morning I will be heading to springfield to get it state sealed.  With all of my other documents I sent them to the courier and she did the state seal and the authenticating in Chicago....well after speaking with her it was clear that if I drive up Monday and do the state seal and then overnight it to her right after I will shave about a week off of my timeline...which for crazy adopting moms is like a year to the normal person!!!!  So....that is the plan....Jason's cousin, Adam has agreed to come over tonight and stay all night so that he can keep Grady tomorrow....since it is a quick trip I just hate to make Grady be in the car all day!!!!  After I get done at the Secretary of State tomorrow I am going to find the closest post office and overnight the paperwork on to our Courier....according to her timeline she will get it on Tuesday and of course doesn't work on wed...so the final paper will be delivered to the consulate on Thursday of this week...I am paying to have it expedited since it is just one document....unfortunately for my timeline Christmas is next week and the consulate closes Mon-Wed for that....so she will either pick my document up on Thursday or the following Monday.....as she doesnt' work Fridays either....so the moral of the story is that after Christmas I will be sending my dossier to my agency and then off to China!!!!!!  Once our dossier is off to China we will wait for a LID which I believe is taking a couple of weeks.  My goal is to have a LID (log in date) by the time that the January referrals come out at the end of January so that we will be eligible.....then it is a waiting game month to month....one shot a month to get her picture!!!!  So now is when we are needing LOTS of prayers...prayers for discernment when we are looking at files, prayers for God's wisdom and direction as to knowing when it is Mabry that we are looking at, and most of all PATIENCE for me!!!!  We started our paperwork in March and so although I am sure you all don't think that is a long time when you are consumed daily with timelines and deadlines it is an eternity.  When you are pregnant you have a due date...and even though I never came close to the due date there was an idea of the longest you have to wait to meet that sweet sweet baby!!!!  With this you process there is NO end date....we just wait until God is ready to reveal Mabry to us!!!!  We are beyond excited that we are to a point where technically we could see her face in January!!!  Will we??  We just don't know....but knowing that we are to the place where every month we FINALLY have a chance is the most amazing feeling!!!!  God bless all of you for following along on the journey and giving us words of encouragement along the way!!!!  God bless you for reading this blog because let me tell you in the future there will be LOTS to share on here!!!!  I plan to blog while we are in China DAILY so that you all can be apart of that journey!!!  There is a lot of differences between babies adopted and babies born to us as far as how the adjustment is handled and a process called Cocooning which I will touch on later when we are preparing to bring Mabry home!!!!!!!

Great ending to an otherwise sad day!!!

Well as all of you that are reading this know today was Chesney's 1st bday in heaven.  We know that she was given to us to lead us to Mabry in China.  Today was a pretty sad day.  Just sad to think about what she would be doing now and all of that, but we know she is having a party in heaven.  Well as I was sitting here watching Sound Of Music Live I checked my email to find an email from our courier.  I knew last week that she was emailing me today but I had totally forgot.  If you are following along you know that I sent our dossier paperwork to the Chinese consulate to get authenticated in Chicago so that when I get our I800A approval (797) I will just send that and then will send our dossier to China.  I went ahead and sent these 13 documents because if there was a problem with any of them or something needed changed I could have it ready to send back when I send our 797 in.  However, in the email from the courier she said that she picked all the documents up today and they are all APPROVED and authenticated!!!!!  So....basically this doesn't mean much for the process as I still am waiting for our 797 but it does mean that at this time my paperwork is FINISHED!!!!  Won't really have any more until we have a referral and are preparing to bring her home!!!!!!  That means that we are THAT close!!!!!!!  Praise the Lord for getting that email tonight!!!!!!!  Also I am sure most of you have seen the testimony video I posted on facebook that we showed at church on sunday....however I know that I have some family that follow my blog by email and don't get on facebook....so I want to post it up here...plus it will be easier to get to in the future if it is on here.  So here it is!!!!  God bless every one of you on this journey with us!!!!


http://youtu.be/wu_7DQ31vuA

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Thanksgiving is here!!

How is it possible that Thanksgiving is already here!!  This year has been full of preschool, football, paperwork and LOTS of praying!!!  When we started the adoption paperwork in March I thought for sure we would be logged in by the end of the year and I am sure now that we would have been had the government not shut down :(.  We submitted our I800A Oct 10, and it is usually a 2 week turn around.  However, with the government shut down they are just simply too far behind to make that happen!!  It is also policy that the people needing immigration approval who have already received their referral get their paperwork put in front of ours, (this is a bummer now but when we have our referral and are submitting this paperwork we will be very happy about this!!!!).  So yesterday I called for an update since it had been about 6 weeks since we submitted immigration and the officer said that it will probably be another 3 weeks.  Well there goes my hope to be logged in by the end of the year.  This isn't a HUGE deal as I am hoping to still be logged in by January but still a bummer!!! 

Once we get the immigration approval, which I am hoping will be the week of Christmas, I will have to send it for authentication which seems to take a couple of weeks.  However, with the holidays  we will have to really have divine intervention to be logged in by January but I am still confident that it could happen!!!  The only other issue is that the end of January is Chinese New Year which will shut down the government in Ch*na and probably means no referrals going out in January.  The real question is how long do they shut the government down and that I don't know. 

I have no question that God is in control and that this wait is needed to get us to Mabry....it's not fun and getting more difficult the closer we get.  The good news is that we are almost there!!!!!  Once we are logged in we immediately become eligible for a referral.  I do know that it will take them about 3 months to translate our dossier so I would be ok waiting those 3 months before we get a referral because I know that the longer we have to wait to see her face the quicker we will travel once we see her.....and that will be a blessing.  This is the crazy thoughts of an adopting mom.....don't want to wait now, want to wait then, don't want to wait then......sorry for the ramble. 

Anyway, specific things to pray for are of course Mabry, her health and that she has someone loving her.  For Mabry's birth mom that so bravely chose life for this sweet child even though it probably was the hardest thing she ever did.  Timeline, pray that we get immigration approval before Christmas (just because I am seriously struggling with this wait).  And then for me because I am struggling a bit with patience.  However, I know that with Thanksgiving here, Chesney's birth day next week, my birthday, Christmas parties and Christmas the rest of this wait will move right along!!!!!!! 

Thanks for following this blog....I am thinking about setting up a full family webpage where I would keep my blog on and also be able to post a lot of pictures.  I know that it would be an easier way to keep everything in one place and I would be able to blog about more than just the adoption.  I will let you all know if that happens or now!!!!  God's blessings to you and your family and hope you have as much to be thankful for this year as I do!!!!!!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!

Prayers appreciated!!

Ok....so I am sure you all saw the dossier paperwork picture where it was laid out on the floor!!!  The process goes that you take 3/4 of that paperwork and get it to the IL Secretary of State office in Springfield and get it with the state seal, then once you have the state seal you get it to the China Consulate in Chicago to get authenticated.  Once that stuff is done then it is ready to go to China.   We chose to send our stuff to a courier and let her take it to springfield and Chicago.  After talking to her, she suggested that we go ahead and send all of the paperwork that we have (we are still waiting for the immigration approval which is backed up and taking longer than expected) so that if there is a problem with any of these documents we will have time to fix them while we are waiting for the immigration paperwork!!  The immigration approval will also need to go thru this process but once this round is done the stress level goes WAY down!!!!!  So...today I mailed off the paperwork that I had to the courier and I should know in a couple weeks if all is well or if there are things I need to fix or redo......so this is where the prayers come in!!!  If you could all be in prayer that this paperwork is right and that the Consulate finds no problems with it that would be great!!! 

I did speak to the Homeland Security office that is in charge of our immigration approval and they said that right now they are running 60-75 days even though it use to only be 2-3 weeks.  SO we could be waiting thru December for that paper still.  I am praying that we get that approval early December so that we can move on to the next step but either way at least I got this paperwork in the mail today so I will have a little less stress!!!  As soon as we get immigration approval and send it to the Sec of State and Consulate and as long as the other stuff I just sent is fine...we will be ready to send our Dossier to China!!!!!  It seems there is an end in sight to the paperwork (at least this paperwork). 

Prayers are appreciated!!!!

INFERTILITY BITES!!!!

So I am a lover of music...I like things with a good beat or a good story.  However, once in a great while there is a song that ever lyric seems to speak to you.  I have a song that reminds me of each of my kids, including Chesney, that every time I hear it I go back to where I was and how I was feeling during that time.  It is no secret that we have struggled with infertility for YEARS, pretty much since I had Connor 9.5 years ago.  This song is one of those songs that has just totally spoke the words of my heart during our infertility...all of it....thru the pregnancies, miscarriages, Chesney and now Mabry.  Every time it comes on my ipod I play it as loud as I can stand, I sing as loud as I possibly can, and I feel EVERY SINGLE WORD.  This song came on today when I was in the car alone and I played it 4 times because it just speaks to me so strongly!!!!  I felt the sense of urgency to post about it and share it as I know so many people that are struggling with their own infertility journeys and maybe this is for them.  I am not sure if you are the one that is suppose to read this, if you are suppose to share this with someone that you know might need it at this moment, or if you are suppose to tuck it in the back of your brain for another time...all I know is that I heard loud and clear that I should post it.  I hope that you enjoy!!!

Moving on!!!!!

So yesterday, oct 8, 2013, I got an email from my social worker saying that she received the letter of approval from DCFS saying that they had approved our home study!!  Not that we were afraid that they wouldn't but this means that we are OFFICIALLY on to immigration!!!  So yesterday she put the approval letter and copy of our home study into the mail!!  I have the paperwork and supporting documents for the I-800A (immigration paperwork) together and as soon as I get the home study approval letter and the actual home study to put in there then I will be ready to submit the I-800A. I assume that this process will take about a month to get approved but really that is just what I am hoping, I think the website says that they will have it done within 90 days. So here is a specific prayer request, pray for a speedy trip thru immigration!!  We will receive an appointment from homeland security to be fingerprinted AGAIN, this time by the FEDS...so once we get that appointment that means that they are working on ours. So today or tomorrow I should be able to submit my immigration paperwork and then we will start preparing our dossier to send to Chiba while we wait for immigration approval!!!!  Things are really starting to move!!!!!!

a little update!!

Ok so I wanted to start with this picture since I spoke about it in a previous blog.  This is Alex with Fred bird and John Mabry - and this event is why we have chosen to name our little China doll Mabry....check out my previous blog but basically it is all about character and humility and just being a darn good person!!!

Since I wanted to post this picture I also want to give you a bit of an update!!!  So we met with our social worker on thursday of last week and read thru our home study.  She had her supervisor reviewing it also and this week it should be sent to DCFS for their IL state approval.  She said in the mean time that we should be putting together our I800A which is our immigration approval paperwork.  So the state approval will take about 2 weeks so I filled out the I800A and am in the process of reordering all our birth certificates because in the life of adoption they only have a 6 month shelf life, so the ones I ordered in March are no longer good.  So basically I just have to wait for those to come back and our IL approval and then we will mail it off for immigration approval to bring Mabry here!!!  Then the next step once we have immigration approval is to gather and submit our dossier to China.  Once that has been submitted we will receive a log in date and that is when the official "wait" begins.  Our agency said that they feel the longest we will wait is 6 months for a referral but we believe that God is in complete control so we will wait how ever long we need to but are hoping it is sooner than later.  The way it works though is once you have a LID (log in date) you are officially eligible for a referral so we will wait and see what God has in store....this paper trail has an end in sight!!!!!!

Thanks for following along on this journey with us...more exciting things to come!!!!

Whales...do they still exist?

So today in church Pastor did another great sermon and although this isn't what he was preaching about his sermon totally led to this blog!!!  During his sermon he said that Christians today think that if only God would send a whale to swallow me when I am going the wrong way that I would then know what God wants for me....now his sermon went on from there but this is where I am staying...because He totally DOES!!!!  Now that whale might not be a fish in the ocean, although I am certain He totally could if he wanted to!!!  I have had many "whales" in my life in the past 10 years!!!

Although adoption has always been something that I have been interested in, Jason and I would NEVER be where we are today, in the process of adopting a special needs daughter from China, without all the "whales" we have experienced!!!  I am telling you it is pure obedience that has brought us here!!!  This was NOT our plan for our life....and we learned from the "whales" that when we run from what God has planned for us you will NEVER win....he will use the "whales" over and over until you become obedient to where He wants you.  And I will say that we must really be slow learners!!!

During the "whales" that we know as 6 miscarriages, we still looked at that as though maybe it wasn't the right time, or maybe God thought that we were done having kids.  So instead of fully listening to where God was leading us we both were more comfortable with the idea that the timing wasn't right or that we should be done with having kids.  I prayed that God would take the desire for more children away from me and that I would be content with the family that I had.  I will say that I did receive an answer to that prayer as the desire never left, so I knew that God was calling us to have more children, what I didn't know is how.  So then we got pregnant with Miss Chesney and felt like the timing had been right and that our family would be complete.  Honestly without the pregnancy of Chesney, adoption would have never happened.  The miscarriages never opened Jason's heart to adoption.  It was in the delivery room with Chesney that Jason looked at me and said, "I don't ever want to see you go thru this again, when you are ready we are goign to talk about adoption".  Now at this time those were just words, but it sure didn't take long before those words became a clearer picture.  We still weren't obedient as we went from there to the idea of surrogacy.  This would be awesome, we had an amazing person that was excited to be a surrogate for us so surely this is where God wants us...WRONG again!!  The final "whale" was when the door to surrogacy abruptly shut without any warning and against all odds!!!

So....finally we became obedient to where God wanted us, and we are totally at peace that this is exactly where we are suppose to be.  Lucky for Jonah it only took 1 whale for him to see that God had a plan for him.  Jason and I didn't get it as quickly but God was faithful in continuing to send those "whales" in order to show us His perfect plan for us!!!

So I just want to say that if you are truly praying and searching for what God has planned in your life, He will totally use a whale, figuratively or actually, to get your attention and to lead you to obedience!!!  Trust that He is sovereign!!  I had someone just the other day say that my blog is making them consider adoption.  Now this is a family that was otherwise DONE having kids.  I hope to do many things thru this blog:  advocate for orphans, advocate for adoption, and show people that being obedient to God leads to the most amazing results.  I will say that adoption isn't for everyone...but just because you are comfortable with your life now doesn't mean that God isn't having you read my blog to show you that you aren't being obedient to His calling.  Maybe He is calling you to buy a shirt, help with other fundraisers that we will do for the orphanage, read the book I blogged about and gain a heart for the orphaned, adopt, or  just find the obedience in another part of your life.  God doesn't promise that we will live this perfect, comfortable little life.  I promise though that although this isn't where Jason and I would have designed our life to be we are beyond excited for this journey!!!

MUST READ

Ok...So I am literally typing this blog just as fast as I can...it is like my brain is working so fast that my fingers can't keep up.  I have never felt as strong about anything as I do at this moment so I hope you are all prepared to listen!!!  So I downloaded 2 books this morning, I know that anyone that knows me and is reading this thinks that is pretty funny because I HATE to read.  Anyway, they are both by the author Kay Bratt.  I am already almost finished with the first one and it is a book that every single person on the planet must read!!!!  The title of the book is "Silent Tears" by Kay Bratt.  I won't tell you too much because I honestly feel so serious about everyone reading and not only that but buy the kindle version and get it on your ipad, iphone or any ebook device so that you can start reading it today!!!  Here is just a little bit about the book, Kay moved to China and lived there for approximately 4 years due to her husbands job.  While she was there she was a volunteer at an orphanage there and this book is basically the journal that she kept while she was there.  It is brutally honest and raw and something that anyone from this great country couldn't possibly imagine!!!

I am more serious then ever about my fundraising for the orphans in China!!!  I have been a bit saddened by the fact that everyone isn't jumping at the opportunity to spend $20, get a shirt in return but  be helping such a great cause.  Now I am on fire!!!!  I am going to be planning many more fundraisers in the future.  Please know that we are paying for our own adoption, that is NOT what this fundraising is about.  This is about raising enough to pay the debt that the orphanage tells us that we have to pay for them having our daughter there for how ever long...and then any extra we can raise will be donated in the form of special bottles for babies with Cleft lip/cleft palate, bars of soap, diapers, formula, toys, clothing and anything else that will be used specifically for the children in the orphanage and their care!!!!

I want to say that I seriously hate to read!!!!  If you are sitting there not even considering getting this book to read because you just don't like to read I promise you will be so appalled by what is going on in this book that you won't be able to put it down.  I also challenge you to read it and consider donating in the form of a check, buying a tshirt, or participating in any other fundraiser that we will be doing such as a possible trivia night or something along those lines.  At this point we have raised a minimal amount but I hope to raise enough to make a different to the one orphanage that we will come in contact with.  Please read the book!!!  Get informed with what these poor precious helpless babies are going thru on a daily basis!!!!!  Then if God opens your heart consider a shirt for the people in your family who sleep on a mattress, in the warmth of your house, and eat meals until they are full with snacks in the middle, and take hot showers daily, and run and play with toys or even get to go outside!!!!!  Know that there are children on the other side of the world that use their fingers for entertainment or softly stroke their own arms in order to feel some sort of human loving touch.  I also want to say that not all orphanages are bad....but all orphanages are full of children who can't possibly get the kind of care that a child deserves, even if the nannies there have the best intentions.  So this isn't about bad nannies...it's about orphans!!!!  God doesn't call us all to adopt but He does call us all to help orphans!!!!  Also if you have an idea for a fundraiser please contact me.  I am willing to do what I need to because at this point this is a mission trip that hopefully I will get to go on next year and as any other mission trip that your church plans there has to be funds in order to get the supplies needed to help these sweet, innocent children!!!!!!  Also if you have a church that would want to get involved and help me sell my shirts please let me know!!!  The shirts are an easy way for someone to help and they can have something in return!!!  I would be grateful to put them for sale in a church bulletin or even if I need to make a trip there on a sunday I will be up for that too.....together we can do this!!!

BIG DECISIONS

Ok, well I have been agonizing over this decision for a little while now but it is finally made....let me take you back!!!  A few months ago I was on a walk at the state lake by my house, it wasn't out of the ordinary for me to be walking out there.  At the end of the walk as I was almost to my mail box I noticed a car drive past and I kept walking noticing that they turned around and were headed back.  Well I turned down my road and so did the car and stopped next to me.  It was a guy that had moved to Collinsville but when he lived in Nashville he went to church with us.  Anyway he asked about our adoption and said that he had a relative that was in the process of getting her second child from China and that her experience had been great and he thought she might be a good reference for us.  So I got her name and figured I probably wouldn't talk to her but it might be neat to read her story as lots of people that adopt do blogs as well.  So I did what anyone would do and facebooked her name.  Well eventually her and I began chatting on facebook.  I was immediately shocked by her adoption timeline...it was obvious that God had really designed her story as it was an unheard of timeline.  I immediately started thinking about whether I was with the right agency.  I just couldn't believe that someone could have the experience that she had.  In talking to her though I met another lady that adopted using the same agency and her story was very similar.  Just an amazing experience that you just don't usually hear about.

So I started praying about what all this means for us.  I put it on the back burner and was just going to pray about it.  Well in the mean time I had some things pop up with my social worker, things that she should have known but that I ended up teaching her.  I have never adopted before and she is a social worker in charge of adoption....she should have known this stuff.  That started to make me question the relationship with my agency as I just didn't feel right with them.  Ever since the convo with the social worker at the beginning where she basically said that maybe I should find a new agency...I just haven't felt like they were on my team...I felt more like I was walking on egg shells trying to keep them happy so that they didn't kick me out of their agency.  Well this put me into really praying about whether we were with the right agency.  So...I began asking others to pray with me.  Well I have been doing research and talking to the agency and what I really like is that basically they are a China Special Needs agency...they aren't dipping in the domestic and all of that...their heart is really for the China Special Needs children.  They go to China and have relationships with 3 orphanages where they get all the referrals from those institutes....and they also participate in the shared list.  So.....today clarity came.  I can't tell you what happened.  I can tell you that I haven't slept well in 3 days just seriously stressing over this but today it just became clear!!  I met these ladies all because it was God's plan and I really feel like we have been led to this new agency.  I am just trusting even tho it is really scary!!!  So....I will spend the next couple of weeks getting all the stuff together to change agencies.  For those wondering, we don't start over...we will basically pick up where we are however because this agency is smaller we will get more attention and should get things moving faster.  So please continue to pray for us that this is where God wants us to be.  Also pray that we are one step closer to meeting Mabry.