GEEKED OUT!!

Ok....so today I went to the mail and receive the packet from Dr Odem's office.  This seriously created lots of different emotions!!!  I started immediately filling out the paperwork and was faced with sadness writing about all of my history and also because I know that I will never be pregnant again per dr's orders.  Although the sadness was there and very real I am also so thankful and humbled that someone (namely Kelly) would be willing to do something like this for us!!!  Then that emotion was met with pure joy and excitement that we get to go meet the dr and "start" the process in just a week!!!  THis is where the geeked out comes in...totally excited that next week we get to finally start laying out this journey.  What will come first?  When will meds start?  How long will it take to get our cycles synced?  How long will all the screenings take?  when will the transfer be?  How soon will we know if this is going to work or not??  Lots of questions and no answers until next week....I think at least half of those questions will be answered next week!!! 

I do want to say that I know that not everyone gets it.  Not everyone understands why this is the journey we are on.  If you had asked Jason a year ago if this was even something that he would be willing to have a discussion about you would have been met with a HUGE and FAST, NO WAY!!!  However, God is so incredible and seriously works miracles in our lives every day.  This isn't something that we have jumped into and decided quickly to do.  If we look back, God has been preparing all of us for this journey for years now.  I wish that I could do it the normal way and decide when I want to get pregnant, get pregnant, and then deliver healthy, on time babies....but that isn't the card I was dealt and I have no doubt that there is a reason for that.  I joke all the time that for someone who is terrible at being pregnant and having babies, I seem to be the "go to" girl with questions relating to these topics....I suppose my obsession with the topic for the last 8 years might be why everyone sees me as the person with all the knowledge, but it's a little ironic because I am really bad at it all myself!!! 

Although I don't know what the reason God has us on this journey is, I am willing to go on the ride because I have no doubt that it is going to be amazing.  I want to keep my thoughts in this blog because I think it will be amazing to look back in 5 years whether there is another member or our family or not and see how this journey impacted the rest of all of our lives.  I guess my message today is, if you listen to God, He will be talking....just make sure that you are willing to hear Him whether it is something you want to hear or not.  Although I would love nothing more then to have a successful pregnancy with our final child like many other women, that isn't the journey God has laid out for me....not exactly my idea of a good time but I am just along for the ride.